[ti:Shticks Of One And A Half Dozen Of The Other]
[ar:Allan Sherman]
[al:My Son, The Celebrity]
[by:]
[offset:0]
[00:00.00]Shticks Of One And A Half Dozen Of The Other - Allan Sherman
[00:06.91]She wheels her wheelbarrow
[00:10.06]Through streets that are narrow
[00:13.59]Her barrow is narrow her hips are too wide
[00:20.00]So wherever she wheels it
[00:23.04]The neighborhood feels it
[00:27.07]Her girdle keeps scraping the homes on each side
[00:33.00]In Dublin's fair city
[00:35.92]Where girls are so pretty
[00:38.75]My Molly stands out 'cause she weighs 18 stone
[00:43.54](That's 256 pounds )
[00:46.97]I don't mind her fat but
[00:55.18]It's not only that but
[00:59.74]She's cockeyed and muscle-bound Molly Malone
[01:13.99]I know a man his name is Lang
[01:17.99]And he has a neon sign
[01:22.64]And Mister Lang is very old
[01:27.33]So they call it Old Lang's Sign
[01:34.53]Oh what have you done Billy Sol Billy Sol
[01:38.99]Oh what have you done charming Billy
[01:43.77]You took almost every cent
[01:46.17]From the you S Government
[01:48.38]Which you spent on fertilizer which is silly
[01:58.68]All day all night Cary Grant
[02:02.97]That's all I hear from my wife is Cary Grant
[02:07.89]What can he do that I can't
[02:12.63]Big deal big star Cary Grant
[02:21.34]Oh the moon is bright tonight upon the car wash
[02:25.82]So I'm having my Volkswagen washed again
[02:30.64]But the way things go with me the way my luck is
[02:35.43]Just as soon as they're finished it will rain
[02:43.53]On top of Old Smoky
[02:45.72]All covered with hair
[02:48.20]Of course I'm referring
[02:50.30]To Smoky The Bear
[03:02.21]Every time you take vaccine
[03:04.30]Take it orally
[03:06.83]As you know the other way
[03:09.01]Is more painfully
[03:16.01]My grandfather's clock was the best ever made
[03:20.51]By the Timex company
[03:25.42]Just like the clock John Cameron Swayze displayed
[03:29.91]Last night on the old tv
[03:34.70]Oh it works under water so perfectly
[03:39.20]And still makes a ticking sound
[03:44.01]Which my grandfather tried only this afternoon
[03:48.82]And that's how the old man drowned
[03:59.06]Do not make a stingy sandwich
[04:01.45]Pile the cold cuts high
[04:03.59]Customers should see salami
[04:05.91]Coming through the rye
[04:15.10]Oh I diet all day and I diet all night
[04:17.34]It's enough to drive me bats
[04:19.43]Got no gravy or potatoes
[04:20.58]'Cause the whole refrigerator's
[04:21.82]Fulla polyunsaturated fats
[04:24.23]Fare thee well Metrecal
[04:26.43]And the others of that ilk
[04:28.82]Let the diet start tomorrow
[04:30.15]'Cause today I'll drown my sorrow
[04:31.38]In a double malted milk
[04:38.23]When you go to the delicatessen store
[04:41.01]Don't buy the liverwurst
[04:43.35]Don't buy the liverwurst
[04:45.45]Don't buy the liverwurst
[04:47.51]I repeat what I just said before
[04:50.21]Don't buy the liverwurst
[04:52.36]Don't buy the liverwurst
[04:56.16]Oh buy the corned beef if you must
[04:58.72]The pickled herring you can trust
[05:00.90]And the lox puts you in orbit aok
[05:05.44]But that big hunk of liverwurst
[05:07.67]Has been there since October First
[05:10.06]And today is the Twenty-Third of May
[05:15.08]So when you go to the delicatessen store
[05:17.51]Don't buy the liverwurst
[05:20.02]Don't buy the liverwurst
[05:22.55]Don't buy the liverwurst
[05:24.47]It'll make your insides awful sore
[05:27.10]Don't buy the liverwurst
[05:29.20]Don't buy the liverwurst